This past summer I blogged about my "Catholic Dilemma," regarding my brother asking me to be his confirmation sponsor. I ultimately decided to decline and he understood. He was confirmed last weekend. I'm glad I made the decision to not be his sponsor because I'm still not in the proper place with my faith. I haven't worked on it, other than meditating, and he deserves better. Ultimately, my grandfather sponsored him.
I look at my brother's faith right now and I see me when I was his age. He's so sure of his faith, and I was too. I think as I've gotten older and learned more history, I've become less comfortable with the Church. I don't think there is a single moment that distanced me from the Catholic Church, but the most recent papal conclave stands out in my mind. That's when it hit me that not a single female helped decide on the new leader of the Church. I've still yet to make a real effort to establish my faith in another denomination or go back to Mass, but hopefully I will again someday. Ten years ago I never thought I'd be this distant in my faith. Time does crazy things.