Thursday, August 4, 2011

Small Comforts

Today was my follow up appointment for my miscarriage. Since I had to have a D&C, they were able to send the tissue for genetic analysis. The results showed triploidy. Everybody has two sets of chromosomes, our baby instead had 3 sets, which isn't compatible with life. Supposedly medicine estimates 1-2% of pregnancies end up in triploidy and it's the cause of about 15% of miscarriages. There are times when I want to be in a select 1% of the population, this is definitely not one of those times. I'm not going to lie, there is a small comfort in knowing it wasn't my body rejecting the pregnancy and that the baby stopped growing because it had to, but it doesn't make the loss easier. Supposedly the chance of our next pregnancy resulting in triploidy is the same as it was with this pregnancy. We'll see what time brings.

Even though I have an answer for this miscarriage, it doesn't make the pain go away. I know in general time helps, but I realized this week that the past two weeks I was in a large amount of denial. I'm not one to broadcast my business (other than blogging, obviously), but this week has been tough. I was at a different hospital for the past two months and now I'm back at the children's hospital. Something as simple as, "oh it's been so long since I saw you, how are you?" is truly hard to answer. Yes, I was off doing NICU last month, but I was also off having a miscarriage. I don't say that, of course, but I wish I had something exciting to answer back.


Anonymous said...

I can hardly imagine how difficult this must be. What you describe is one of the reasons that I wasn't waiting to tell people about my pregnancies both times. I knew that, if something happened I would want to be able to talk about it and not try to avoid questions. I would want to be able to just say out loud what happened and have it out.

I am glad you were able to find out the reason of why this happened. I know it doesn't stop the pain, but it does help understand.

I know that your time will come ... soon, very soon you will be moaning and groaning about pregnancy pains :) *hugs*

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